In The Time of the Knights
By: Bryan Kress
“Have at ye good sir!” Edward yelled. “Ugh…Edward shut it, you’re not a knight. You are our prisoner.” Sir Jonathon said as if he has said it many times before. “But, I AM a knight!” Edward replied, saying not only for Sir Jonathon but for the rest of the knights as well. “You are a time travelling witch who we captured in the woods and no matter HOW many times you tell us we will not believe that you are actually a knight, so shut it and let us handle this!” Sir Jonathon shot back, he was starting to become extremely annoyed with Edward as this was becoming a daily argument. “I am too! I know knight stuff…like dragons and swords!” Edward whined. “Dragons. Are. Not. REAL.You imbecile!” said Sir Jonathon. “I feel as if you don’t respect me as a knight,” said Edward. “THAT”S BECAUSE YOU AREN’T A KNIGHT!!!” yelled Sir Jonathon. At this point the small French infantry Sir Jonathon and his men were sent to capture had been surrounded them because of his and Edward’s squabble. “SURRENDER NOW OUR BE KILLED!” a French knight yelled. “OH look what you’ve done Edward!” Sir Jonathon yelled. “I think you started it…I was ready to fight.” Edward said, softly.
“So at least the shackles aren’t too tight…” Edward said, trying to divert the evil glares given off by the rest of the knights he helped get captured, “This isn’t what I imagined when I was growing up, you know learning to be a knight an stuff…in this time period.” Edward added. “You see why we say you’re a time traveler, you keep trying to convince us you’re from this time period, you keep asking if this is really the year 1124, you were wearing clothes not seen in any land I’ve been to, and you keep asking if we’ve seen something called a Family Guy!” Sir Jonathon said, writhing with fury. “Quiet your mouths!” one of the Frenchmen yelled at the group. “Hey fuck you frenchy!” Edward yelled back. “Well I feel as if I got us into this, so as a knight I will get us out of this situation.” Edward said to his fellow knights. “Fine, do as you wish. Just don’t get killed.” Sir Jonathon said, wishing that he did get himself killed.
“Hey frenchy, let me out I have magical powers n’ shit.” Edward said, winking at Sir Jonathon. “What did you say? Prisoner?!” the French guard asked. “I got time travel powers and I have a warning for you, and the French” Edward replied. The French guard thought for a moment and then said, “Alright we’ll see,” he let Edward out of the cell and said, “Wait a moment, I’m going to get someone else to deal with you.” Right as the guard turned his back Edward threw his arms around the guard’s neck and strangled him with his shackles. “Well…that worked.” Edward said to himself. He picked up the guard’s keys and unlocked his shackles. He then let out the rest of his knight brothers. “I can’t believe that A) worked AND B) they only have one guard down here with us.” Edward said to Sir Jonathon. “Well they are French.” Sir Jonathon said. “Ah yeah!” Edward exclaimed and lifted his hand, expecting a high-five. “What is that you are doing?” Sir Jonathon asked. “Oh nothing…” Edward replied, disappointed.